Assume goodness in people

I haven't posted in quite sometime but working on myself has continued. For those of you who know me well, you know that I can be one of the most giving yet judgemental people around. I have the ability to give everything I have (love, possessions, time) and then at other times be very negative about those around me. One of my goals has been to be less judgemental, more loving and more positive. Slowly but surely this is happening. I have been doing a Bible study and many of the studies bring me to scripture on loving others and God's love. One of them was specifically on loving instead of judging. AWESOME!!! I have also tried to start understanding why people do what they do. What happened in their world that made them angry, cynical? Being a counselor, I know things that are occuring that others do not, and it has opened my eyes to trials that others are going through. So, I have started trying to take a step back and find something good within everyone around me. Seeing through eyes of compassion and love instead of critical eyes. It is a very freeing way to see.

Standing in front of a mirror

Stand in front of the mirror for five minutes and focus on at least five things that you love about yourself. Write them down in your journal.

So, even though I HATE looking in the mirror, I did this challenge. I've never really liked my looks. But this is about love, not hate, and after about a minute of getting past what I don't like, I started focusing on what I do like.

~I love the freckle in the middle of my nose.

~I love the fact that my butt is getting smaller and my waist is getting bigger. Never thought I'd say that.

~I love the color of my hair.

~Since I haven't been wearing make-up lately (it just comes off when I'm having my all-the-time-not-just-morning sickness) my skin is clear. I like that.

~I love my small forehead. It doesn't wrinkle, even when I frown.

My Emily

We just spent 5 days at the dude ranch in Bandera for Spring Break. We had an awesome time riding horses all day long. My little girl Emily is almost 6. Most of the time she is a pure joy to be around. I smiled the whole trip just watching her and how she interacted with people. Everybody loved her and begged us to stay longer. Even the cowboys who are normally quiet and distant would get excited when Emily walked up. Emily just has a spark that makes everyone happy and a sparkle in her eye that makes even the toughest of cowboys melt. She is so sweet and I love watching how she is growing up. Don't get me wrong, she can be a huge toot often enough. But I cherish these magical moments like the week at the dude ranch.

Behind

I am a little behind on posting, but I figure that is okay. I have been working really hard at trying to be grateful and/or positive for that which I have and the world around me. My birthday was this past Monday, and I had figured it would go by unnoticed. I was wrong. The weekend consisted of many fun events starting with bowling where everyone dressed up. I was on the granny rollers team, and we dressed up as grannies and bowled with the granny roll. On Saturday, I had people over to the house for a celebration. I figured around six people would show up but planned for all that had been invited. Around twenty-five friends showed up at my house ready to celebrate and have a good time. I was given homemade cards, a balloon, wine, book and cake. The night consisted of laughter and food which make a fabulous mix. Sunday, I ended up at the pool for around four hours with some friends I don't see often. Monday, my students brought chocolate cake and a movie, so we laughed and enjoyed for two class periods. I had asked God to help me not feel so lonely, and he surrounded me the entire weekend. I also received more messages than I can count in my inbox reminding me that people back home love me, and I was on their minds which is HUGE!! My prayer was answered and the loneliness disappeared to be replaced with notes, hugs, and laughter. My cup overflows.....

Confession

I have a confession to make. I told a little, little fib on our Gratitude Challenge. The truth is that I do not, nor have I ever, had a stomach bug. Sort of. I have been sick, because I have the kind of bug you give a name to after 9 months!


I'M PREGNANT!! I've been keeping it quiet, but we went to the doctor today, and the doctor said everything looks really good, so we decided to let the cat out of the bag. We are both so very excited (we've been trying for a baby for about a year now). Right now, my due date is around October 22nd.

So guess what I'm grateful for today??

Happy Birthday, Jen!

Today I am very grateful for Ms. Janice and Mr. Paul (Mom and Dad) for having Jennifer!! Happy Birthday Jenn!!!!

From Tara...not sure what to title it..lol

Today, make the effort to live life with a positive outlook. Restrain from criticizing the people around you. Dare to see the glass half full. Listen more than you speak. Give freely of yourself. Practice kindness at every opportunity.

Wow. That's a lot. In the last couple of years, I truly have begun to live life with a more positive outlook, and it has freed me from stress I didn't know I was carrying. Criticizing people...well, that is a weakness with me sometimes. Never my friends, but I do sometimes snap to judgement with strangers. Sooo.....in this challenge, I have begun to befriend a lady that lives next door to me.

She is older than I am but very sweet and somewhat ill (she fell this winter and hurt herself pretty badly, and also has another chronic ailment). She is also beginning to recover from a lifetime of suppressed emotions due to a series of very tragic events. And I get the feeling she is very, very lonely. Her husband is a doctor at the local hospital and works long hours. Even though she is not someone I would choose to befriend, I have "given freely of myself" and truly tried to practice kindness. And I find myself enjoy each visit more and more. It is hard to listen to her stories sometimes, because I hate to see people hurting, but I know it helps. Sometimes we just drink tea and watch our dogs play, sometimes we actually go places. It is a bit straining sometimes, because she calls quite often, but I just remind myself that it makes her so happy when we "hang out". I do sometimes ignore her calls, but I'm trying to be more patient. Which has never been one of my qualities.

And listening more than I speak is something I've been trying to do for a while. It's a long journey. I remember that I received an evaluation at work once that said I talk more than I listened, and I was furious about that! I thought it was completely untrue and totally made up until I came home and started complaining about it to Brandon. And he shocked me by saying, "Well, I'm not trying to make you angry, but you do that to me sometimes. When I'm talking to you, I don't think you're listening. You just seem to be thinking of what you'll say next." It was an eye opener. So ever since then, I've been much more aware of trying to listen. It's a true talent, those natural listeners. I sometimes have to literally tell myself, "Don't speak. Listen. Just listen."

This is a long post, sorry. And I know I'm not quite on schedule, but I've missed a few days being ill. I hope it's okay if I just post the ones I think I'm on? If not, lol, someone tell me what day we're on!

Enjoy the people around you

This past weekend I had the priviledge of going home. In Honduras, feelings of isolation can sometimes creep in and take over my mood, so going home was a welcome time of being surrounded by people. I was able to enjoy both family and friends. I was surrounded by the best girlfriends a gal can have (a few were missing) and family the entire time. There was no time for isolation to creep in and they pushed it off a cliff. We laughed, cried, and just sat by each other with never a silent moment. I had more hugs than I can count and felt love and acceptance all around. I cherished each moment with these special people. Being away has made me realize how many special people are in my world.

the 2 week mark

Tara, so sorry to hear you have been ill. I hope the stomach bug has moved one and you are all better.
In the two weeks of the challenge it has become obvious we share gratitude for: our families, our pets (yes, I know they are family, but they deserve special recognition), travel, apples, and the ability to blog knowing someone cares what you think. I am grateful for the great stories from each of you and I hope everyone is having a great weekend.

Touch

Sorry I've been tardy, but I haven't quite been feeling good lately. Stomach bugs are mean!! I've been stymied by the senses challenge, but finally had a breakthrough. I can think of so many gifts that I've been given from touching.

Those of you that know me know I am a toucher. I always have to feel things, fabrics, carpets, I'm always touching it. And hugs! I love hugs!! Giving and receiving. But to feel something, to touch it, is to be a part of it. One of my favorite building in Chicago is the Tribune building, because they have pieces from famous landmarks from all over the world, and you can touch the pieces.

But my favorite gift has been my grandmother's thimble. When I use it to sew on buttons and such, I feel a connection to her. I can just imagine her finger in the same spot as mine, doing the same thing I'm doing. It's such a wonderful gift. So I'm very grateful for the sense of touch.

think positive

I must admit that making an effort to take everyone's actions and comments in only a positive mode made me laugh a lot more today. The one place I did have a hard time with positive thinking was while driving - Baton Rouge traffic is an experience like no other. I will try again tomorrow to think positive as I drive beautiful oak-lined Highland Road to LSU. See, that sounds better already.

Senses....

I have been thinking about which sense I want to focus on for this blog and have found it to be hard because so many times all fives senses are used at the same time. I will settle on smell for now. Many family gatherings during my life have revolved around food. I remember arriving in Shreveport to my Memaw's to the smell of red beans and rice. I always knew we were in for a treat when the steaming bowls were placed in front of us. On Christmas Eve, I would arrive at my Mama Lou's to the smell of seafood gumbo cooking. I now associate Christmas with the smell of gumbo. When I go home to my parent's house, there is usually some new recipe being tried and the smell takes over the entire house and lets me know I have arrived home. In Baton Rouge, we always wake up at least one morning to coffee(every morning), fresh cooked pancakes or biscuits, eggs, bacon, and sausage. These smells I associate with being surrounded by love. I love the smell of fresh bread, pie, gumbo and fried shrimp. I love the smell of food because it usually means good conversation is on the way with lots of laughter and hugs, and I am surrounded by family.

Five senses

The sense of smell has always fascinated me. No two people smell the same odor the same way. Your nose can smell directionally, telling you where an odor originates. A woman’s sense of smell is keener than a man’s. People recall smells longer and with greater accuracy than visual pictures. I really want to share just one “smell experience” with all of you. My dad was an auto mechanic and the aroma of varsol solvent is all it takes to make me feel loved from head to toe. As a child, I would smell that scent and know to run to the back door for a welcome hug that made the world perfect. My dad died in 1990, but twenty years later I can still feel like the most special person in the world by just walking through the repair area of any auto shop.

The last few days-

I called my uncle, of my mom's six brothers he is the only one living. When we last talked he was planning to move near his wife's oldest son. I went about my life knowing he was secure, loved, and well cared for living near his extended family. Well, the move did not occur, I believe, for finanical reasons, he did want to discuss it. While, he and his wife are fine, there is a void in their life of living apart from all their family. I hope to help fill that need. I wonder how many other people I have so easily placed in their "box" knowing all is well for them and moved on in my "busy" life. Self evaluation is never easy - but, I am grateful for the simple task, "call someone you have not talked to in a while."
The text picture Janice send me in front of her new SUV was the best. She has not only deserved a new car, but needed one for so long - think of me when you sit on that heated seat. Also, John did not teach me how to post pictures, which may be a good thing.
When the challenge said "five people," I immediately thought of my two sons, two nieces, and my nephew. But, all five have no doubt I love them, admire them, and support all their enterprises. So, I send notes or emails to two of my former professors (I have not seen since they retired), two high school friends (I have not seen in 15 years), and a church friend. All are well, and the first to respond was my church friend, who I lost touch with when she changed to First Church to allow her parent to continue attending "their" church, while she cared for them. We had spend, so many years, co-teaching Sunday school, helping in children's choir, planning fund raising, and a month each summer at Church camp. How could I have lost touch? We will be meeting for soup and salad lunch every other week for the foreseeable future.
I hope everyone has had the same positive outcome from these challenging gratitude tasks.

Thank you notes

So I sent out my thank you notes to my five people who deserved recognition. And I also want to share that a friend of mine from college, Jinger, was so inspired by the things she is reading that she has started doing the gratitude challenge on her blog as well! Here is her site if anyone is interested, and feel free to leave comments.

http://jinjer-spice.blogspot.com/

I also made my calls to a person I haven't spoken to in a while, and have to admit that it was the first challenge that I've been a little nervous about. And I love this person dearly, but we just don't talk like we used to, and I was a little nervous about the call. Strange, isn't it? But all went well.

So here is my sixth note of recognition, because I would like to thank Jennifer for inviting me to do this challenge with her. Thanks girl!! I'm loving it. Hmmm...now I'm hungry for McDonalds.

I would add a picture if I could figure out how. I am very grateful for many moments in my life. The best moments were shared with my family. When my children graduated from college I wanted to take a special family vacation, because I knew that the dynamics of my family would soon change. I am so thankful for the time that we spent together in New York City. This is a place that I thought I would never enjoy going to because I thought that it would be difficult to get around. I was right. It is a huge city. However, I was wrong as far as it being difficult to get around it. My family would point me in the right direction and we were off to explore the treasures of New York City. I loved it!!! Jennifer is right about the Ellen Star Dust Cafe. They sang all of the Oldies But Goodies. The girls wore poodle skirts and bobby socks. We got the old time ice cream sundaes. They were so good. We ate in a French restaurant and sat by doors that opened up like windows so that you felt like you were sitting on the street. Seeing the Statue of Liberty was a WOW moment. Wicket was a fabulous play as was Phantom of the Opera. I loved riding the bus with my family and touring the city. The Yankee game and the surroundings of the Yankee Stadium was like going back in time. The vendors selling peanuts, cokes, and beer was like seeing the past. People passed the food and drinks up several rows and across 25 to 30 people before it got to the person who bought it. We ate hot dogs and peanuts. Paul was like a little kid at Christmas. He reminisced about sitting on his grandfather's lap and watching the Yankees play on TV. We met some very friendly and kind locals who helped us get on the right subways so that we ended up where we were supposed to. Time Square was bigger than life. Walking through the financial district and seeing Wall Street and the Bull was an eye opener in itself. The church that was next to the Twin Towers where presidents had sat and worshipped and the rescuers would take a break was another WOW moment. Our family time and the fun we had exploring New York City together was one of my favorite memories. What an awesome family I have. God is wonderful.

Family

The following pictures are a few from my grateful moment. When I look through the New York pictures, my mood automatically rises, I have a grin that hurts and I sometimes cry for joy. We went to a restaurant where the waiters danced and sang, and my mom would smile the entire time. We went back a few times because she loved it so much. My dad had a hotdog at Yankee stadium with me which was a dream come true. I saw the cafe from You've Got Mail. I had more fun in New York with my family that week than at any other moment. I know there were times we argued just because we are family, but I don't remember that part. I remember the part where we experienced an adventure as adults. We laughed until at least I cried and stayed up late talking. I will treasure those moments forever and hope to make more in the future, but with an added bonus. Jackie will be with us next time.

From Tara: Grateful picture

Take a picture of one thing, person, place or specific moment that makes you feel grateful. Share it with your social network.

My picture is of a specific moment. Saturday mornings Brandon usually sleeps in till 11am, but somehow Bruno (our Cavalier King Charles Spaniel) always knows when it is time for Brandon to wake up. And so every Saturday morning he jumps into the bed, and snuggles next to Brandon, rolling over and making noises of pure joy until Brandon starts playing with him. They snuggle and play for about 10-15 minutes, then both are up and in a happy mood. I am always so grateful for the these moments, because it is just so cute and sweet. The smile on both their faces (yes, Bruno smiles!!) gives me such a feeling of joy and gratefullness every week.

When I went away for a week this past summer, Brandon called me when they were snuggling and put me on speakerphone, so I wouldn't miss it. He knows just how much I love it. So these are a couple of pictures from this mornings snuggle session.

Call....

Today's post is to call someone you haven't talked to in awhile. I will have to think on this one because I try to talk with everyone. I think I will call Bo or Rachel. Bo is my great aunt whom I rarely see or speak to, but I hope that changes when I return. Rachel is one of my closest friends, and I miss her. Being in Honduras I don't call many people, so I guess my list could be very long of people to call.

Yesterday, we didn't have students and only had to work part of the day. Today, we are not working at all. Why? Because we had a wind storm that took out trees, power, roofs, and more. I have power now, but the school does not. I think this gives teachers and students a much needed break from each other. I sat with friends last night talking and laughing well past my normal bedtime and was grateful for their open door policy and laughter. We shared a glass of wine and chocolate cookies while laughing until some of us cried.
I know this isn't part of today's challenge, but I am grateful for all of you posting because I smile and think of more to be grateful for as I read your posts. I also am starting to recognize more when I am being negative or those around me are being negative and never realized before how much I skip over looking for beauty in my day. Love you all and will let you know who I call later.

God has blessed my life in many ways. Family (including some that have adopted us as parents and we have adopted as our own which I love, friends, jobs, wonderful neighbors, and a Cowboy Church where we have made more new friends. For these things I am very thankful. You see one of the definitions of God is,"God is love." The more unconditional love that I have around me the happier and more content I am. Love feels like a big hug from God. God has blessed Paul and me with steady jobs while living in a time where that is not the norm. The teachers that I taught with for many years got together the other night and had so much fun it was hard to any of us to leave. Laughter and Chatter for hours. Heaven on earth. My children are so thoughtful and caring. It amazes me the friendship that has formed between us as they are now adults. I love getting together with them. Now I have one more precious child. My son is getting married to a thoughtful, caring, and loving cowgirl. She is delight to be around. One of my prayers is that my children marry into a family that loves them and is kind to them. He as answered that prayer for my son. I am bless that my daughter, who lives in Honduras, set me up on Skype and taught me how to use it before she left so that we could talk and see one another on a daily basis. We have had so much fun. I even got to visit her and see where is lives. Honduras is a beautiful country. She has gotten to travel and see places that she would not of seen had she not gone there. I am looking forward to seeing all three of my children next weekend. My children are a gift from God. After writing this blog today I can see that I am truly blessed. God's riches are in his name,"Love." He has showed me with his love and I plan to remain under this shower as it feels so good.